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Culture Focus: Baby Showers

pregnantWhat is a baby shower?  A baby shower is a type of party for a mother-to-be.  In American culture, when a woman is expecting her first child, it is common for friends and relatives (usually, women) of the mother-to-be to hold a baby shower for her.

Why do people have a baby shower for an expectant mother?  The purpose of a baby shower is to provide the expectant mother with items that she would need to take care of a baby.  It is to help her get ready for her “blessed event.”

What types of things make good baby shower presents?  Clothes, toys, and diapers are, of course, practical gifts that are greatly appreciated, but there are other things that also come in rather handy:  strollers, car seats, baby buggies, cribs, and playpens are some examples of “big-ticket items” (things that tend to be somewhat pricier) that generally top an expectant mother’s wish list, along with cute baby clothes, blankets, and receiving sets.  Often, a group of friends or relatives might get together and “pitch in” (contribute) towards the cost of one of these big-ticket items, thus blessing the mother-to-be with a stroller or other large gift without it being too much of a financial burden on any single individual.  Other ideas for baby shower gifts include handmade blankets, sweaters, hats, booties, or similar items that can be passed down from baby to baby, eventually becoming a family heirloom.

What are some other benefits to having a baby shower?  Besides providing financial support for a new baby in the form of presents, a baby shower can also provide a new mother with emotional and moral support from the other women there, particularly if they have already experienced motherhood themselves.  Advice, suggestions, and tips for dealing with a fussy newborn or other unfamiliar situation can give the expectant mother wisdom, guidance, and confidence, thus helping her to adjust to her new role as mother.  Sometimes there is nothing like talking to someone who’s been in your shoes, and knows what you’re going through!

What else happens at a baby shower?  Like most other parties, food is involved.  Usually, the food that is served at a baby shower is “finger food.”  Finger food is food that can be eaten with the fingers – in other words, no silverware is necessary.  This includes foods such as sandwiches, fruits, and the like.  But this is not a strict rule, as often there are also foods like salads and cakes, which would be much easier to eat using a spoon or fork rather than one’s fingers alone!  Other activities at a baby shower would include games:  guessing how big the baby will be, when the baby will be born, or identifying baby food by taste are some examples of games played at a baby shower.

When is a baby shower held?  There is no hard-and-fast rule as to when to have a baby shower.  A baby shower may be held before the baby is born, usually towards the end of the pregnancy (in the last trimester).  Other times, a baby shower may be held after the baby is born.  This might be the case, for example, if the mother has a boy after having several girls – although she would already have a stroller, crib, and plenty of “girl things,” she would no doubt appreciate clothes and toys that are specifically for boys, especially if she didn’t know in advance that the baby was going to be a boy!

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Writing Assignment: At a Wedding Shower (Solution)

Wedding shower

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1.    Where was this picture taken?
This picture was taken in a house (living room).

2.    Who do you see in this picture?
We see a young lady, and an old woman.

3.    What are the people in this picture doing?
The young lady is holding a present, and the old woman is watching her.

4.    What kind of clothes are the people in this picture wearing?
The young lady is dressed in a bridal gown.  The older woman is dressed up.
5.    What is the young lady in the picture holding?
She is holding a heart-shaped present of some sort.

6.    What kind of emotions do you think the young lady has?
She is probably happy and excited.

7.    What kind of party is this?
This is a wedding shower, or a bridal shower.

8.    Who is probably the hostess for the party?
The hostess for the party is probably bride’s maid of honor.

9.    Who else might help the hostess with the party planning and preparations?
The bridesmaids and maybe the bride’s mother might help the hostess with the preparations for the bridal shower.

10.    Who would be invited to this party?
The people that would be invited to the bridal shower would be the bridesmaids, the mother of the bride and other female relatives of the bride, and other female friends of the bride.

11.    Would there be any male guests at this party?
No, there are usually no male guests at a bridal shower.

12.    Why are there usually no men at a bridal shower?
There are usually no men at a bridal shower, because most men would find it boring to be at a party with a group of ladies talking about things that interest women.

13.    Would there be any children at a bridal shower?
There probably would not be any children at a bridal shower, because they would not find it interesting and become easily bored.

14.    What types of presents would the guests bring?
For a bridal shower, the guests usually bring presents that help a bride to set up housekeeping – presents like small kitchen appliances (toasters, mixers, etc.), linens (towels, bedclothes, etc.), and other handy things for the home.

15.    How do the guests know what types of presents would be good for the bride-to-be?
The guests can get a good idea of what would be good presents for the bride-to-be by consulting the bridal couple’s gift registry, or wish list, if they have registered such a list at a store.

16.    What sort of decorations would be appropriate for this kind of party?
Appropriate decorations for a bridal shower would be wedding-themed, with hearts or turtle doves, white and other pastel colors, wedding bells, and so on.  There are also usually some small party favors for the guests.

17.    What sort of food would be appropriate for this kind of party?
Cake, punch, and light snacks such as appetizers and hors d’oeuvres would be appropriate for a bridal shower.

18.    What sort of activities would be appropriate for this kind of party?
The kind of activities that would be appropriate for a bridal shower would include fun, light-hearted games that help “break the ice,” giving the women a chance to socialize and chat with one another.

19.    How could the bride-to-be keep track of who gives her which presents?
The bride-to-be can keep track of who gives her which presents by keeping any tags or cards with the presents.  It will also help her if the hostess writes a list of the presents, and who they are from.

20.    After the shower is over, how can the bride express her gratitude for all the presents she has received?
After the shower is over, the bride can express her gratitude by sending thank-you notes to all the people who gave her the presents.

Paragraph:  At a Wedding Shower

When I got married, my maid of honor had a bridal shower for me.  The shower was held a few days before we got married.  Everybody met at my house for the shower.  There were appetizers and snack trays with carrot sticks and other vegetables for people to eat, along with some cake and punch.  In the middle of the table was a lovely floral centerpiece.  My friends came to my shower.  There were many presents for me to open, and it was nice of everyone to think of me and help me get ready for married life by giving presents to help furnish the kitchen and the house.  After opening the presents, there was a lot of talking with all the women there.  Many of them had some advice for me as a bride-to-be.  I was thankful for my maid of honor to host the wedding shower for me, and I was thankful for my friends helping me to get ready for this new phase in my life.

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Writing Assignment: At a Wedding Shower

Wedding shower

Click for larger image

Vocabulary

bride
shower
party
hostess
maid of honor
bridesmaid
invitation
guest
present
card
registry
wish list
housekeeping
party favor
decoration
activity
game
appetizer
hors d’oeuvre
punch
cake
thank-you note

1.    Where was this picture taken?
2.    Who do you see in this picture?
3.    What are the people in this picture doing?
4.    What kind of clothes are the people in this picture wearing?
5.    What is the young lady in the picture holding?
6.    What kind of emotions do you think the young lady has?
7.    What kind of party is this?
8.    Who is probably the hostess for the party?
9.    Who else might help the hostess with the party planning and preparations?
10.    Who would be invited to this party?
11.    Would there be any male guests at this party?
12.    Why are there usually no men at a bridal shower?
13.    Would there be any children at a bridal shower?
14.    What types of presents would the guests bring?
15.    How do the guests know what types of presents would be good for the bride-to-be?
16.    What sort of decorations would be appropriate for this kind of party?
17.    What sort of food would be appropriate for this kind of party?
18.    What sort of activities would be appropriate for this kind of party?
19.    How could the bride-to-be keep track of who gives her which presents?
20.    After the shower is over, how can the bride express her gratitude for all the presents she has received?

Paragraph:  At a Wedding Shower

Have you ever heard of a wedding shower?  Have you ever attended a wedding shower?  Do you have a similar custom in your country?  What do brides do in your country to get ready for a wedding?  Write a brief paragraph about wedding preparations in your country.

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Culture Focus: Wedding Showers

June – the traditional month for weddings – is just around the corner, I thought I’d take a look at wedding showers for this Culture Focus.  You probably know what a wedding is, and what a shower is, but what does the phrase “wedding shower” mean?

A “shower” is a special party for a person – usually, a pregnant woman (“mother-to-be”) or, in today’s Culture Focus example, a woman engaged to be married (“bride-to-be”) – to give the lady presents especially suited for the big change in life that she is about to experience.  So, a “wedding shower” is held for a bride-to-be, and the gifts given to her are intended to help her establish a household with her new husband.  The origin of the bridal shower probably stems from the older practice of a bridal dowry.

Who usually attends a wedding shower?  Well, of course the bride-to-be will be there, but not the future groom.  Showers are overwhelmingly attended by women (and sometimes teenage girls), so most men will be glad to escape to the golf course or other safe place while their wife or girlfriend is at the shower.  Most of the time it is the bride’s maid of honor who is responsible for arranging for the shower:  the maid of honor will invite the women to come, arrange for refreshments, plan a few games or other activities for the shower, and so on.  The other bridesmaids may help the maid of honor with the planning and logistics of this task, especially if there will be a lot of women at the shower.  Other ladies who are generally invited to the shower include the female relatives of the bride (her mother, grandmother, sisters, aunts, cousins, etc.) as well as female relatives of the groom.  Close friends of the bride are also invited.  And, of course, the females in the bridal party (maid of honor, bridesmaids) are also there.

What kinds of gifts are usually given at a bridal shower?  Traditionally, the purpose of a wedding shower was to help the newlyweds establish a home together, so the gifts tended to be focused on practical things, such as kitchen appliances – toasters, blenders, pots and pans, etc. – and other items for the house – towels, bed clothes and other linens, dishes, silverware, etc.  Nowadays, though, many single people are accustomed to having lived on their own after getting out of college, so there is more flexibility with the gifts given to the new couple.  To help provide guidance as to what items the bride and groom need, many engaged couples set up a “bridal registry” at a department store.   This registry is the couple’s “wish list,” and people can take a look at it to give them an idea as to what to buy for the couple.  If they buy the present at the store where the couple is registered, then the list will be updated so others who access the list will know that the couple no longer need a bath towel set, for example.  The concept of a “bridal registry” is very convenient – no matter how much a couple may enjoy toast with their breakfast, they surely don’t need five toasters!

What do women do at a bridal shower?  Just like any other party, there is a lot of talking and eating!  Rather than serving a full meal, the food is usually “finger food” (appetizers, snacks, small sandwiches, and the like), and generally a cake.  Besides talking and eating, the bride will open her presents, while the other guests admire her gifts.  It is said that for every ribbon the bride breaks while unwrapping her presents, she will have a child.  So, if she breaks five ribbons in the course of opening her gifts, she will have five children!  Of course, this is just a fun fable, and there is no truth to it, but people like to guess how many children are in store for the new couple.  Finally, there might be a few games or activities for the shower attendees to enjoy, such as “How well does the bride know the groom?”, “Bridal Bingo” (based on what types of presents the bride gets at her shower), “Design the Bridal Gown,” or “Advice for the Bride.”

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